本人的高一英语作文,求批阅和建议,Can parents be friends?Recently I surveyed my classmates about their views on whether parents can be friends,and here are the results.About 45 percent of my classmates strongly believe that beingfriends _作业帮
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本人的高一英语作文,求批阅和建议,Can parents be friends?Recently I surveyed my classmates about their views on whether parents can be friends,and here are the results.About 45 percent of my classmates strongly believe that beingfriends
本人的高一英语作文,求批阅和建议,Can parents be friends?Recently I surveyed my classmates about their views on whether parents can be friends,and here are the results.About 45 percent of my classmates strongly believe that beingfriends with parents is completely impossible,for their parents are involved in work and business all the time,having no chances to care for them.However,the rest of my classmates held a view that it’s still possible to make parents our friends.It is said that their parents communicate with them by heart regularly at home,who are just as their best friends.Generally speaking,it depends on whether children and parents could respect and understand each other.As children,we should fully aware of out parents’ affection and hardness in life.As parents,they should allow us to grow more freely and hold on to our own dreams.Only then can both sides reach an agreement and develop friendship.作文就是以上,希望各位能够进行批阅,指出语法错误,提出修改建议,
personal suggestions:Recently I surveyed(可以改成investigated或者是made a survey on) my classmates about their views on whether parents can be friends,and here are the results.About 45 percent of my classmates strongly believe that being friends with parents is completely impossible,for their parents are involved in(这个短语不是特别贴切,are buried in或者concentrates on 或者are absorbed in）their work and business（有些重复,建议把and business去掉） all the time,having no chances to care for them（这半句话语法貌似有问题,改成and naturely,they are lack of energy to form a friendly relatonship with their children.However,the rest of my classmates held a(改成the) view that it’s（不缩写会让句子显得更加有力） still possible to make parents our friends.It is said that(貌似不大恰当,According to their opinion) their parents communicate with them by heart regularly at home,who are just as their best friends(这半句有些凌乱,按成分来说这里的who指代的应该是前半个句子的这个事件,而不是大主语.而用who,额……偶真的迷茫了.定语从句是很好的句子,但用在这里难免有些刻意卖弄的感觉.如果一定要用,把who are改成which is吧,时间只有一个.……或者直接省略which is感觉会好点,至少自然些……）Generally speaking,it depends on whether children and parents（parents and children)换个顺序是否好些） could respect and understand each other.As children,we should (加个be)fully aware of out（our吧………） parents’ affection and hardness（加上on us) in life(我们!孩纸,这肿么还出单数了呢?in our lives还差不多吧~).As parents,they should allow us to grow more freely and hold on to our own dreams.(这句话没什么语法问题,但是,孩纸啊,从学生的角度来写,我觉得应该侧重于我们应该怎么办,怎么与家长建立好的关系,而不是对家长提出要求,然后our own dreams,这个偶又有点迷茫,让家长坚持我们的理想……逻辑有点问题吧~如果一定要这样写,建议把hold on to 改成support 是否好些呢~） Only then（是打错了吗?明明是only when) can（can怎么能加在这里呢?） both sides reach an agreement （can we加在这里才对啊~）and（and去掉吧,要不这句子没法看） develop friendship.（最后一句改成这样吧：Only when an agreement is reached by both sides,can we form a friendly relationship with parents.)再啰嗦两句,作为一个高一的孩纸,与同龄人相比,你的语言积累真的达到了一个很高的水平,能够将这些东西真正运用到写作中是一件很不容易的事.但是你还没有能够将这些东西做到一种融会贯通的地步,有些生涩.但是高一能写成这样,相当不错了.全文的children建议都换成adolescents（青少年）或者students,毕竟我们已经过了'孩子"的年龄.最后说下,你的文章结尾有些散,看看题目,问的是能不能,所以在最后一段应首先承认这样的关系是可以被建立的.可以用“it can be encapsulated from the factors above that a friendly relationship can certainly be established as long as an ageement can be reached by both parents and students."整个文章是标准的三段式,建议少说一些别人的观点,多说自己的观点,毕竟作文考的是你的想法与语言运用能力.写的不错,继续努力哦~高一英语作文 精心收集的各类精品文档，欢迎下载！
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